Monday, September 12, 2011

Back to Reality

...again. Haha. AFest ended last week. I'm still so exhausted from it though. I don't know why, but I've napped almost everyday since it ended ~_~ My memory feels like it's depleting. AMINO ACIDS WHY CAN'T I MEMORIZE ALL OF YOU?! As soon as I sleep and wake up I suddenly forget them all again. Arggh. So frustrating.

I find myself daydreaming a lot during the day about plushies and patterns. Awful.. I know.. My last semester of my bachelor's degree and I can't even focus. Is science really my thing? Somewhere along the way I'm sure that changed. I just never accepted it. My goals and dreams are on opposite ends of the spectrum. Oy. Hopefully something will slap me in the face soon and make me realize what I'm supposed to do with my life.

Have you ever read The House on Mango Street? We read it back in jr high, though I can hardly remember a lick of it now. Anyways, I was going through my old box of things looking for a flashing light thing for my nephew and I found an excerpt my best friend from then had written for me. I can't believe I kept it all these years. It was such a pleasant surprise. I really do love that excerpt. It just hits me, ya know?

"You could close your eyes and you wouldn’t have to worry what people said because you never belonged here anyway and nobody could make you sad and nobody would think you’re strange because you like to dream and dream. And no one could yell at you if they saw you out in the dark leaning against a car, leaning against somebody without someone thinking you are bad, without somebody saying it is wrong, without the whole world waiting for you to make a mistake when all you wanted, all you wanted was to love and to love and to love and to love, and no one could call that crazy."

I love it.

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